I love it. 😁
My second time there, but today is more memoriable.
I love it, although they comes late.
As soon as all the gelandangan comes and waiting for them, my eyes stay still with this one little baby.
Rindu adam. Motif kan?
So i told aizat with that suara yang macam omagad omagad i really really wants to hold that babe.
So aizat encouraged me. Pergilah zawa. Siap bagi ayat bagai.
Banyak kali patah balik sebab tak berani and end up tengok kesian mak tu nak jaga baby lagi and yeyyy dapat dia.
He was so cute. I thought he was a girl lol. But a part of me sangat sedih. Sebab dia kotor. It's not that saya jijik. Just because i felt like its a pity for him. Hm. Tahi telinga dia sangat banyak. Dan dia kepanasan. Entah. Moga moga rezeki dia luas kemudian hari. Allah tu Maha Pemberi Rezeki. Yang jauh mahupun yang dekat.
And, maybe today outfit or literally my shawl colour today will be my favourite after listening to you. 💕
Sunday, 27 March 2016
Wednesday, 23 March 2016
MAS MARCH 2016
Hai.
MAS is basically Minggu Aluan Siswa. Orientasi kinda like for the new intake.
And this March is specifically for Foundation students. Turns out i am one of the facilitators.
How did i become one ?
Here a girl, asking me and my best friend to join it, together with her, saying that " Alaa aku tanak masuk sesorang " and she keep insist us,, so we just fill up the form and send it.
Ikutkan hati lah, taknak masuk. Sebab before i start this 2nd year, i promised myself to join only one event per semester. Sebab result 1st year kelaut. Tahu bukan semata sebab join event tapi eventsss did contribute too.
And I sent the form with a hope that "Moga moga tak dapat" hahahaha. I already tried to apply for facilitators about 2-3times and i got rejected ! REJECTED! Bazir gambar aku je letak kat form.
And turns out, i get it. *Much regretted at first*. But and but, lucky me, i got the same department with my best friend so tak awkward cumanya haha tak berkembang lah networking aku.
So yeah, I lost 2 weekends because of MAS. First weekend because I need to come to T.O.T or Training of Trainee. Best but bored a little bit but still enjoyed it with others facilitators. I kinda felt bored because the tentative feel like dragging the time but actually its because i got Test, Assignment and Presentation to be done for the upcoming week. Haha nampak tak alasan aku.
And, bermulalah officially bekerja as Facilitator MAS.
The first and the second day of MAS tu registration day.
Me sakit hati in many ways, dengan mak pak.
"Takde lif ke kat sini?" sound sarcastic for me. Ma'am, village ni cuma 4tingkat. EMPAT. Tak kurus pun anak makcik dan g naik atas tu. Tingkat dua je pun.
Dan , sesetengah parents yang bising dan herdik aku bila aku tak bagi bapak abang naik bangunan asrama perempuan.
Mana mana universiti encik pergi pun, memang tak boleh. Apatah lagi UTP bila dah ada student perempuan UG dalam bangunan ni. Encik masuk rumah tu, tetiba ada orang keluar berkemban dari toilet. HAH siapa nak jawab.
Takpe, all is well. Cuma sakit hati ah aku dah lah tengah tak berapa nak sihat then bila nak tolong angkat barang anak dia kena marah semua. Haihh.
Memula I mengeluh lah, GOD, I need to stay up till 1 am - 2 am sebab ada post mortem EVERYDAY ! Haha, tapi slowly I try to adapt and blend in with all of the facilitators and I enjoyed my job.
I love it bila ada budak contact "Kak ,saya sakit". "Kak, how about this". Kak blablabla. Entah. Suka.
Hahaha. Cuma ada lah dua orang budak ni buat slack dengan aku time aku hantar pergi klinik naik kereta. Ada ke patut dedua ekor tu duduk kat seat belakang and act like i am a driver. Haih, nasib baik time tu aku yang hantar. Kalau orang lain, dah lama tinggalkan je korang kat tepi jalan tahu tak. Dahlah bukan sakit betul pun, mengada je sebenarnya. Pffffft.
I enjoy. With Putri yang selalu ada dengan aku, dan yang buat lawak hambar aku jadi lawak macam MLM. Dengan Ipey and Popi yang selalu ada kat belakang time post mortem. Haha, so kitorang lah antara setan setan yang buat bising tu HAHAHAHA. That professor thingy sangat lawak #mudahterhibur. I enjoyed my walk all along with Popi and Putri time Discovery Session. Best gila. Dengan bebudak yang sporting tu. And they respects me walaupun I banyak gelak hahaha sorry. I am a serious person actually hahahah.
I enjoy my job sebab my department sangat superb dengan Lim yang emo tapi gila, strict tapi lawak, Kak Beela yang comel gila pipi dia sebab gebu gila, Kak Farhana yang nampak macam pendiam tapi gila dia boleh tahan, Andrea and Regina yang always there untuk layan aku dan random silliness aku, Acam dan muka lawaknya *antara peminat tegar lawak aku*, Khai yang pendiam dan gelak bila perlu je HAHA ni paling tak terkesan dengan lawak aku, Bob yang kuat main tapi caring dan baik. Haih how can i move on with MAS macam gini.
Dengan malam malam kita yang lepas post mortem pergi lepak mamak and kepsi cari makanan. Mengantuk tokleh bukak mata pun still bergelak gila HAHAHA.
I enjoy.
Dan, the best moment in my MAS journey as Facilitator ialah bila Tuan Aliff cari aku.
Terima kasih Aliff. Sebab ingat saya. Walaupun saya bukan senior buddy awak.
Terima kasih sebab at first you don't know yet don't remember my name, but at the end of our closing, you wants to see me. :) All the best, I hope you stay. If others bullied or belittle you, tell me. Nanti saya sound dorang HAHA.
Kinda disappointed sebab tak dapat join sekali time closing ceremony, datang datang dah habis dah ceremonynya sebab i got meeting untuk CDM yang lagi 8hari je lagi nak start huhu. Cuak.
But, I still love the last day.
And for that, I , officially resigned from Welfare Department for MAS March 2016.
Thank you :)
Regards,
Zawani
MAS is basically Minggu Aluan Siswa. Orientasi kinda like for the new intake.
And this March is specifically for Foundation students. Turns out i am one of the facilitators.
How did i become one ?
Here a girl, asking me and my best friend to join it, together with her, saying that " Alaa aku tanak masuk sesorang " and she keep insist us,, so we just fill up the form and send it.
Ikutkan hati lah, taknak masuk. Sebab before i start this 2nd year, i promised myself to join only one event per semester. Sebab result 1st year kelaut. Tahu bukan semata sebab join event tapi eventsss did contribute too.
And I sent the form with a hope that "Moga moga tak dapat" hahahaha. I already tried to apply for facilitators about 2-3times and i got rejected ! REJECTED! Bazir gambar aku je letak kat form.
And turns out, i get it. *Much regretted at first*. But and but, lucky me, i got the same department with my best friend so tak awkward cumanya haha tak berkembang lah networking aku.
So yeah, I lost 2 weekends because of MAS. First weekend because I need to come to T.O.T or Training of Trainee. Best but bored a little bit but still enjoyed it with others facilitators. I kinda felt bored because the tentative feel like dragging the time but actually its because i got Test, Assignment and Presentation to be done for the upcoming week. Haha nampak tak alasan aku.
And, bermulalah officially bekerja as Facilitator MAS.
The first and the second day of MAS tu registration day.
Me sakit hati in many ways, dengan mak pak.
"Takde lif ke kat sini?" sound sarcastic for me. Ma'am, village ni cuma 4tingkat. EMPAT. Tak kurus pun anak makcik dan g naik atas tu. Tingkat dua je pun.
Dan , sesetengah parents yang bising dan herdik aku bila aku tak bagi bapak abang naik bangunan asrama perempuan.
Mana mana universiti encik pergi pun, memang tak boleh. Apatah lagi UTP bila dah ada student perempuan UG dalam bangunan ni. Encik masuk rumah tu, tetiba ada orang keluar berkemban dari toilet. HAH siapa nak jawab.
Takpe, all is well. Cuma sakit hati ah aku dah lah tengah tak berapa nak sihat then bila nak tolong angkat barang anak dia kena marah semua. Haihh.
Memula I mengeluh lah, GOD, I need to stay up till 1 am - 2 am sebab ada post mortem EVERYDAY ! Haha, tapi slowly I try to adapt and blend in with all of the facilitators and I enjoyed my job.
I love it bila ada budak contact "Kak ,saya sakit". "Kak, how about this". Kak blablabla. Entah. Suka.
Hahaha. Cuma ada lah dua orang budak ni buat slack dengan aku time aku hantar pergi klinik naik kereta. Ada ke patut dedua ekor tu duduk kat seat belakang and act like i am a driver. Haih, nasib baik time tu aku yang hantar. Kalau orang lain, dah lama tinggalkan je korang kat tepi jalan tahu tak. Dahlah bukan sakit betul pun, mengada je sebenarnya. Pffffft.
I enjoy. With Putri yang selalu ada dengan aku, dan yang buat lawak hambar aku jadi lawak macam MLM. Dengan Ipey and Popi yang selalu ada kat belakang time post mortem. Haha, so kitorang lah antara setan setan yang buat bising tu HAHAHAHA. That professor thingy sangat lawak #mudahterhibur. I enjoyed my walk all along with Popi and Putri time Discovery Session. Best gila. Dengan bebudak yang sporting tu. And they respects me walaupun I banyak gelak hahaha sorry. I am a serious person actually hahahah.
I enjoy my job sebab my department sangat superb dengan Lim yang emo tapi gila, strict tapi lawak, Kak Beela yang comel gila pipi dia sebab gebu gila, Kak Farhana yang nampak macam pendiam tapi gila dia boleh tahan, Andrea and Regina yang always there untuk layan aku dan random silliness aku, Acam dan muka lawaknya *antara peminat tegar lawak aku*, Khai yang pendiam dan gelak bila perlu je HAHA ni paling tak terkesan dengan lawak aku, Bob yang kuat main tapi caring dan baik. Haih how can i move on with MAS macam gini.
Dengan malam malam kita yang lepas post mortem pergi lepak mamak and kepsi cari makanan. Mengantuk tokleh bukak mata pun still bergelak gila HAHAHA.
I enjoy.
Dan, the best moment in my MAS journey as Facilitator ialah bila Tuan Aliff cari aku.
Terima kasih Aliff. Sebab ingat saya. Walaupun saya bukan senior buddy awak.
Terima kasih sebab at first you don't know yet don't remember my name, but at the end of our closing, you wants to see me. :) All the best, I hope you stay. If others bullied or belittle you, tell me. Nanti saya sound dorang HAHA.
Kinda disappointed sebab tak dapat join sekali time closing ceremony, datang datang dah habis dah ceremonynya sebab i got meeting untuk CDM yang lagi 8hari je lagi nak start huhu. Cuak.
But, I still love the last day.
And for that, I , officially resigned from Welfare Department for MAS March 2016.
Thank you :)
Regards,
Z
Tuesday, 22 March 2016
Hating Myself
Its hurt to know that everything u did just make the distance ever larger. Haha.
"Dia jadi takut nak buat apa apa, jadi the real her, sebab takut akan buat awak moody"
I just hate myself even more.
For letting others hurt themselves because of me.
I find myself useless in many ways. Yes i am.
Apa je kelebihan aku? I can't seem to find it neither list it out.
Apa keburukkan aku? Gimme papers, even an infinity count of papers is not enough to list it out.
Now, after all this shitty things, i just want to be alone. Its okay, its hurt. But at least its only me. Not others. Not because of me.
Hurting others doesn't helped me to rebuild myself. It destroyed me. My self confidence. My identity. I just lost it. In many ways.
I just hate it to know, because of me others cried.
I just hate it to know, because of me, someone can't be the real him or her.
I just hate it.
I am lost. In my own world.
Lost it, and just can't seem to reached it yet.
People hate me, it doesn't hurt much.
But people love me when i am hurting them, its hurt. So much.
Please.
Just let me alone.
Doesn't meant i hate you,
I just hate myself.
Regards,
Zawani
"Dia jadi takut nak buat apa apa, jadi the real her, sebab takut akan buat awak moody"
I just hate myself even more.
For letting others hurt themselves because of me.
I find myself useless in many ways. Yes i am.
Apa je kelebihan aku? I can't seem to find it neither list it out.
Apa keburukkan aku? Gimme papers, even an infinity count of papers is not enough to list it out.
Now, after all this shitty things, i just want to be alone. Its okay, its hurt. But at least its only me. Not others. Not because of me.
Hurting others doesn't helped me to rebuild myself. It destroyed me. My self confidence. My identity. I just lost it. In many ways.
I just hate it to know, because of me others cried.
I just hate it to know, because of me, someone can't be the real him or her.
I just hate it.
I am lost. In my own world.
Lost it, and just can't seem to reached it yet.
People hate me, it doesn't hurt much.
But people love me when i am hurting them, its hurt. So much.
Please.
Just let me alone.
Doesn't meant i hate you,
I just hate myself.
Regards,
Monday, 21 March 2016
Emosi
Siapa saja yang pernah atau masih rapat dengan aku,
pasti maklum akan emosi gila aku.
Sebab aku perempuan?
Atau mungkin sebab aku ialah aku.
Emosi aku tak menentu.
Boleh jadi aku bergelak sakan hingga kau rasa aku manusia paling bahagia di dunia.
Boleh jadi tiga saat kemudian, aku bermuram durja hinggakan kau rasa aku manusia paling menyedihkan di dunia.
Sebab aku punya perasaan yang complicated,
hingga aku sendiri persoalkan kenapa aku ni sangat mengelirukan.
Boleh jadi aku gembira, boleh jadi tiba tiba semua benda menyerabutkan datang menyapa.
Hah, saat itu aku berdiam.
Ketahuilah, aku sedang sakit di dalam.
Sakit yang aku sendiri tak mampu ungkap.
Sakit yang kadang buat orang sekeliling aku juga jadi sakit.
Sakit hati.
Kelebihan aku lah tu.
Zawani
pasti maklum akan emosi gila aku.
Sebab aku perempuan?
Atau mungkin sebab aku ialah aku.
Emosi aku tak menentu.
Boleh jadi aku bergelak sakan hingga kau rasa aku manusia paling bahagia di dunia.
Boleh jadi tiga saat kemudian, aku bermuram durja hinggakan kau rasa aku manusia paling menyedihkan di dunia.
Sebab aku punya perasaan yang complicated,
hingga aku sendiri persoalkan kenapa aku ni sangat mengelirukan.
Boleh jadi aku gembira, boleh jadi tiba tiba semua benda menyerabutkan datang menyapa.
Hah, saat itu aku berdiam.
Ketahuilah, aku sedang sakit di dalam.
Sakit yang aku sendiri tak mampu ungkap.
Sakit yang kadang buat orang sekeliling aku juga jadi sakit.
Sakit hati.
Kelebihan aku lah tu.
I am trying my best to not let others hurt while i am hurting, but, the best thing that happens is others hurt more because of me...Satu ketika, aku diam seribu bahasa. Aku tolak semua yang dekat. Hingga ada yang kata
"She love you and gives you everything that she could, but at the end of the day, you pushed her away and make her shed a tears.".
Dan aku terdiam kaku, bila dia menyambung "Saat kau berpaling dari dia, dia terus menangis kata 'i had lost my best friend, and i don't have any friends right now'. "
Maaf. Untuk tiap air mata yang jatuh.
Maaf. Sebab aku sendiri tak boleh nak tolong kau.
Sebab aku sendiri rapuh.
Sebab air mata aku juga laju jatuh. :)
Sampaikan satu ketika, aku berfikir bagusnya kalau aku mati, mungkin semua akan okay. Bagusnya kalau aku dah tak ada di sini, mungkin dah tak ada yang sakit.
Regards,
Tika Itu
Hai.
Saja berkecimpung semula dalam dunia blog.
Hari hari aku sekarang cuma asyik melihat coretan orang,
buat aku terfikir, kenapa tidak aku menulis ?
Coretan orang yang kadang buat aku persoalkan,
kadang buat aku dalam bingung,
kadang buat aku simpati dan empati,
pada siapa, aku pun keliru.
Dan coretan itu yang kadang sebenarnya bagi aku sumber kekuatan.
Untuk persetankan semua yang jadi.
Regards,
Zawani
Saja berkecimpung semula dalam dunia blog.
Hari hari aku sekarang cuma asyik melihat coretan orang,
buat aku terfikir, kenapa tidak aku menulis ?
Coretan orang yang kadang buat aku persoalkan,
kadang buat aku dalam bingung,
kadang buat aku simpati dan empati,
pada siapa, aku pun keliru.
Dan coretan itu yang kadang sebenarnya bagi aku sumber kekuatan.
Untuk persetankan semua yang jadi.
Regards,
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)